How To Find A Dominatrix In London

How To Find A Dominatrix In London

How To Find A Dominatrix In London 

How To Find A Dominatrix In London. After the success of How To Find A Dominatrix, I was asked to write another article, detailing how to find a London Dominatrix. I happily obliged; after all, it just so happens that kinky research, BDSM and erotic blogging are my three main pursuits. 

As you may be aware, there are a lot of professional Dominatrixes in the capital, all offering different services, and experiences. Each will have their own kinks and fetishes. Some love to be worshipped, others will set about teaching you a lesson through a hard caning, and others offer cock and ball torture. I aim to show you where to find these glorious goddesses and give you some top tips on what to expect from a meeting with one of them. I'll also be sharing with you where you can find Dungeon's for hire and how much do Dominatrixes in London cost?

Here you will find my top tips, including my Do's and absolutely Do Nots. (unless you want severe punishment) Shall we begin? 

Why You May Want To Use A Mistress 

When you think of a professional Dominatrix, and the clients or people who use them, it's hard not to envision middle-aged businessmen, asking for their balls to be busted by a PVC dress cladded, whip-wielding goddess. 

I certainly did, and have done for many years. Please don't think that this is your fault however; if you think of how female Doms are portrayed in popular culture and porn, this image is all too familiar.

How To Find A Dominatrix In London

So, are all Dominatrixes like this? No. Some do fit this stereotype, but they don't live like this 24/7. Most Professional Doms that I have met over the years have been extremely conscientious of their client's needs and work hard to ensure the client gets as much pleasure as possible. (yes, I know that sounds strange) They work hard to build up trust and rapport with the paying customer and tailor-make the session to their requirements. In other words, they don't just flog you, verbally abuse you and then you leave. (unless you asked for this specifically, of course) A good Domme will make sure her client is involved, every step of the way. 

A good dominatrix should be captivating, charming and conscientious. 

A Pro Domme will push your boundaries, know when to stop, and will expertly assess what you enjoy and how you respond to her touch.  

Are Dominatrixes For Men Or Women? 

Indeed, the vast majority of people who use a Professional Dom are male; however, some also play with single women and accept couples. The best thing to do is to check out their profiles and testimonies. You can always send an email to your chosen Dom. As a general rule, as a woman, I wouldn't feel comfortable playing with a dominatrix who didn't identify as Bisexual. 

Where To Find A Dominatrix 

As ever, if you want to find anything these days, heading online is the most convenient method of seeking out whatever you wish to find. There are a lot of listings on google for professional Doms. Besides individual websites, you will also come across Mistress directories where you can compare various profiles before making a decision. 

You can also use specialised sites such as bdsm.com or fet life, and talk to other people in the kink community to see what recommendations they make. Although these sites are more tailored towards members of the kink community, some mistresses do have profiles. If you are looking for a chat or email exchange with a Dominant woman, then using one of these platforms may fit the bill. Social media is also a popular choice, as many Dommes use Instagram and Twitter to reach out to their fans and followers. 

What Do You Wish To Experience? 

Before you start scouring the internet, you need to think about what you want to experience. Have you had a desire or type of fantasy that you wish to make a reality? You should bear in mind that your chosen Mistress will list what services she does and does not provide, so there is no point asking her for something that she already has stated she will not do. 

How hard are your limits? Is face slapping ok? Spitting? Spanking? Torture?

Sissification? Perhaps you would like to be caged? Or maybe humiliation and degradation is your thing? Before you approach a mistress, make a list of potential scenarios you want to enjoy. A good mistress will have a lengthy discussion with you before any BDSM session, to ensure your needs are met, after all, you are the customer. 

How To Find A Dominatrix In London

Remember that a session with a mistress is unique, intimate and incredibly personal, so the more you share with her, the more you will get out of it. It can be challenging to open up to her, trust me, I know, but once you do, (and you have spent time finding a mistress who is personable and professional) it will be a lot easier.

You will find that some mistresses have their own play space and offer sessions in the confines of their dungeon area, whereas others will travel to a hotel. You can also hire a dungeon for the session, and very often, a mistress will be able to recommend ones locally. I will provide several London Dungeon listings for you. 

How To Approach A Suitable Mistress

Sending a message simply saying 'I want to be your slave' isn't going to get you very far.

It's a safe assumption that you will probably find your desired Mistress online, (I did) and therefore, will be presented with a few options contacting her. There may be a link for you to email her, her phone number to call her or message her, and if you find her via social media, you may be tempted to send her a DM. These means of getting in touch with her are all fine, but make sure you read thoroughly through her profile as some mistresses state how they prefer to be contacted, and what they expect from your communication.

Mistresses get inundated with one line wonders, slave requests and guys who aren't serious about meeting. To spark an interest with a mistress, write an engaging message. Not just a list of what you want, but why you want it and how you hope she will enjoy it. Sending a message simply saying 'I want to be your slave' isn't going to get you very far. 

Where To Find A Dominatrix In London

Professional Mistresses

Professional mistresses offer fully comprehensive listings for a variety of mistresses throughout the whole of the UK. Still, you can also search by London area, meaning you can find a mistress in your locality. You can browse through mistresses, read their profiles and see what areas they specialise in. Some have mobile phone numbers attached, and others have links to their social media accounts. Also on the website, there is a mistress news and blogs section where you can find special events, workshops, training sessions and other services that you may find useful. 

London Mistresses

As the name suggests, The London Mistresses is the place for London Doms. Here, you can search by postcode or location to find a mistress that is close by. Also on the site is a 'novices' section where you can find lots of frequently asked questions concerning London Mistresses. There is also an extensive photo gallery of all the doms that they list. 

The London Mistress

No, I haven't gone mad, yes, the name is similar, (it too is called The London Mistress) but the website is different. The London Mistress has a site that lists Submissive girls, Switch Dommes, Subs seeking corporal punishment, bondage, discipline and fetish fantasy. Fetish nurses, Nannies, Adult Baby Diaper Love, Medical Fetish Mistresses, and Disciplinarian Mistresses who offer caning, spanking, punishment and domination. They also have information on dungeon hire and BDSM studios that can be hired overnight. 

London Retreat 

Based In Earls Court, the London retreat offers the whole package. The playroom, the Dungeon, a team of dedicated Mistress and not to mention quite possibly the most extensive range of equipment you could hope for! Located in the affluent Earls Court area, The London Retreat provides you with a BDSM sanctuary. 

Where To Find A BDSM Dungeon In London 

Many Mistresses operate out of specific private dungeons and can assist in hiring the Dungeon for the session. Most dungeons and play spaces come very well equipped and are home to all manner of toys and implements ready and waiting for your Mistress to get her loving hands on. Safety should always be a priority and your health should always be of utmost importance. Any insertables should still be used with condoms. Here are two dungeons that are highly regarded in the London area. 

London Dungeon Hire

London Dungeon Hire offers excellent value in superb surroundings, close to the centre of London. It's sumptuous, seductive and sexy. They don't have their own mistresses, but you are free to book the dungeons and arrange your own. Dungeon hire includes access to an extensive collection of boots, shoes, masks, wigs, hoods, steel implements, leather paddles, electrical toys, bondage and discipline equipment, as well as top quality dungeon furniture. 

The Secret Dungeon

The Secret Dungeon offers both a BDSM play space and a boutique B&B in one! Well-equipped and well-stocked, the Secret Dungeon is perfect for people who want a more extended session, or an overnight stay. It boasts an impressive four-poster bed and a hot tub! 

How Much Does A Dominatrix In London Cost? 

Sissification? Perhaps you would like to be caged? Or maybe humiliation and degradation is your thing?

When conducting my research into Dominatrixes In London, I found that most charge on average around £150 per hour. Some are slightly less and if the cost isn't listed on her profile, then enquiring is the best option. Some mistresses offer services that don't cost this much, such as phone calls and texts, and they will list them as 'paid consultation services'. These services may be pay per minute. Dungeon hire cost may be based on how many hours you wish to have it for, and what days of the week the hire falls on. I found that a lot of dungeons started at around £150 per hour.

How To Find A Dominatrix In London

When discussing cost and London Dominatrixes, there are some out there who offer 'financial' domination. Now, for me, this doesn't appeal, but for some customers, this type of dominance might appeal. So, If you want to surrender your hard-earned cash, to an almighty, all-powerful mistress have a look in one of the directories. 

Can I Meet A Dominatrix In A Hotel? 

Dominatrixes are amazing, but they aren't mind readers! Don't be shy, tell her what you want. 

Yes! If you can't, or perhaps don't want to hire a dungeon, then hiring a room in a hotel can work just as well. Some mistresses expect an upmarket (think 4* at least) hotel, and she may want to meet you in person in the bar area for a quick drink before any play commences. The last Mistress I met, we did just this and I loved it! Don't worry about being discreet; Mistresses understand that discretion is crucial and take this very seriously. 

Finding A Dominatrix- The Do's

  • Be realistic. She isn't going to have sex with you, perform any sex acts on you or run off with you into the sunset. Professional Doms are discreet, professional, careful and in most cases, absolutely lovely too! An experienced Dom should work hard to put your mind at ease and make the whole process a breeze. Sure she may have you bound and gagged, but she won't leave a mark or trace (unless you ask her to). It's her job to turn fantasy fun into reality! A great Mistress will be creative in her methods and sensual in her touch. 
  • Do your research first! Not all Doms offer all services, and some specialise in specific services (i.e. couples and Bisexuals), it makes sense to have a thorough read-through of what they offer before you approach them. 
  • If there is a particular toy you have, or item you enjoy using or being used on you, make sure you include it and tell her what you want! Dominatrixes are amazing, but they aren't mind readers! Even if she has a well-stocked dungeon, if it's important, don't be shy, tell her what you want. 
  • Do make sure you establish where and when is ok for you to orgasm. Yes, this sounds clinical, but it made the experience so much more enjoyable. 

Finding A Dominatrix- The Dont's 

  • Don't expect any kind of sexual intimacy. Mistresses are there to do a job, not have sex with you. 
  • Don't be shy! Easier said than done, I know! When you first approach a Dominatrix, either on a lifestyle dating site or via her own website, be polite, courteous and to the point. Sending messages such as 'I want to be your slave' or 'how can I serve you?' will land you with nothing. If you want the service she is offering, then say so. Make your message stand out in her inbox. Demonstrate to her that you have taken time to read through her profile and learnt about what she offers. 
  • Don't get offended if she wants her tribute (money) upfront. 
  • Don't rush into it, take your time, there are many great Doms out there, find one you really can connect with and feel completely relaxed talking to.